Crazy Eyes

I couldn’t have imagined Face Book posts would someday play a role in my dating life …or lack there of. Lets be honest my dating life consists of a bottle you’re finest Argentinian Malbec and Mean Girls on replay.  Online dating has its risks as well as its happy endings. My last adventure was brought to me via OKcupid. Now OKcupid supposedly has somewhat a better reputation than Grindr, Jackd, or Scruff to name a few.  Honestly though, OKcupid is basically Grindr but with actual face pictures and minus the sea of chiseled and voluptuous torsos. 

He was 6ft 1, Red hair (love a cute red head), fit, handsome, and killer Hollywood smile. We began by harmlessly chatting and quickly followed onto texting.  He was quite a distance away so planning around our schedules had become a bit of a task (which ultimately worked in my favor). I asked to add him on Facebook after about a week of back and forth texting.  I figured this was a great way to get to know him a little better since we had not met in person yet. My first impression was he seemed a bit immature from what I gathered from his posts but I was willing to give him the benefit of the doubt. Though his next post was met by my immediate disapproval… “I don’t get why gay guys want to have equal rights and get married maybe they should stop being sluts before they expect to get treated equally” and proceeded to naming a list of guys I’m assuming he had dated. My first thought was “well if we ever had a fight, you would clearly seek the attention of your online audience to console you” and second…”Did he just say that? I mean really…did you not watch Bridgroom?” That movie even made my black hole of heart leak out a quiver of emotion.  I decided I would gently let our conversations fade into non existence. He took note of this and asked me if I had stopped texting because of his FB post to which I responded “yes.” I mean I’ve heard of watching out for “Crazy Eyes”…but Crazy posts?

A week later he texts, “If you didn’t think I was attractive you could have just said so”…really dude? If the post didn’t make me lose interest this text did it for me… or was it the second OKcupid profile I found; both of which were active. One stated he was in retail management and in the other he was a Nurse…. Dating should come equipped with a bulletproof vest because I definitely DODGED THAT BULLET (again).

-Miss Ellaneous

2 thoughts on “Crazy Eyes

  1. Enjoyed this read!!! I, too, understand what your going through, this digital dating life can be a real bummer. Good luck and I hope you find a better stable-minded suitor next time.


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